I used to be into the kind of music you’d hear at Vans Warped Tour. I never made it to one myself, but I always wanted to go. I’m not bitter about it anymore, but I remember being extremely disappointed when I learned 2018 was the last one. I wasn’t able to go that year, even though I was 18, because I was scheduled to be in Fort Sill, OK for the entire summer. It came and went. All things must come to an end. I never experienced an Elvis Pressley concert, he was gone long before I was born. I decided the same feelings should be directed to Warped Tour.
I don’t listen to that kind of music very much anymore, but it’s not removed from my catalog. A Day To Remember was from Ocala, FL, and boy did you hear about it. They did not seem to be terribly fond of their hometown, often referring to it as “The Downfall of Us All” or something like that. I’m not here to analyze lyrics today, however.
Today, I reflected on what I consider my hometown. I was born in Michigan, but I don’t live there anymore and haven’t for a very long time. I’m not comfortable disclosing my actual hometown, but I live in the Portland metropolitan area. For over a decade now, the rainy Pacific Northwest has been my home, and I still greatly enjoy the weather. Even with the rising temperatures every year, this part of the USA is still what I’d consider the nicest place to be.
The Cascades are beautiful, and on a clear day, I can see Mt. Hood and Mt. St. Helen’s just driving around. That hasn’t gotten old, not in over a decade. It really is beautiful out here, you’re never too far from a wonderful nature trail. In terms of nature, this place has it all. After all, it’s this place where I met the love of my life.
Over time, however, I’ve had difficulty liking where I am. This area has become extremely crowded, many people are moving out here. Traffic is pretty awful, and it’s not even just downtown where that’s the case anymore. With the booming population, this area’s character has changed drastically. Many people consider Portland the city of hipsters, and while this is still true, the general populace has become much ruder, more brazen, and uninviting.
Having lived in the Detroit metropolitan area prior to living here, I’m decently familiar with not having much of a relationship with neighbors. I did not live in a particularly bad area, but it wasn’t as good as where I am now. Maybe it’s because I was a child, but I remember a constant unease when I went outside. More and more, I feel that way being outside out here as well.
I’m familiar with my city, I know where just about everything is. Every time I drive around, I don’t feel much of anything. The traffic is dense, the people are rude, and everything is extremely expensive. I hate it here.
My fiancee loves this area, mainly for the weather and the natural sights. I don’t see myself leaving the Pacific Northwest anytime soon, but I have this urge to uproot. If I’m going to continue to live here, I don’t want to stay in my current city. I fear the price of moving somewhere else, especially at such a young age, and I’m not very confident I’ll have the chance to leave anytime soon.
We’ve talked about this in the past, and I’m okay with staying in the valley. I just need a change of scenery otherwise. For a metropolitan area, there is a shockingly sparse amount of things to do; rather, a sparse amount of activities that interest me.
Songs that talk about leaving a hometown speak to me on a personal level for this reason. Who I am is partially due to where I lived, and I feel as if this city has offered everything it can possibly do for me. Now, to meet housing demands, the parts of this city untouched by concrete jungle are becoming a dying breed. The concrete itself is particularly a gross, depressing grey. I prefer the grey skies to the grey landscape.
Sometimes, I feel like this city is a contributing factor to my problem. I know at the end of the day I can most likely pull out just fine where I am, but at the same time, I feel like I struggle because I hate where I am. The overcrowding is suffocating, and the rising cost of living is terrifying, especially to someone who doesn’t make a well-established career salary.
At least it isn’t Ohio.
In times like this, I feel hopeless. I do my best to avert my thoughts when I think about my hometown, but there are days like today where it’s where it stays. I’m stuck in a depressing city with depressing people. Without sounding too dramatic, the mountains really do help me keep it together. In spite of it all, I’m still in a beautiful area. In my attempt at today’s parting optimism, I reflect on that. Sometimes, you just gotta keep your head up high enough to look over the grueling structures and out beyond, to the mountains and forests. If you drive far enough, you’ll get there. If you’re patient, maybe you could even stay there someday.
